It’s not always easy in living Europe. As well as the tornadoes and bi-annual smallpox epidemics, Europeans tend to suffer also in terms of being on the tail-end of Nintendo’s release plans; at least compared to Japan and North America (our Australian readers have our sympathy). Despite Nintendo’s oceans of cash, you’d be surprised just how many Wii and DS games don’t actually release on our shores. The Brain Training generation may have made Europe a video game market to be reckoned with, but it looks like the days of shafting are far from over. These are all recent, first-party Wii and DS titles that, for one reason or another, just weren’t worth localising.

We honestly can’t blame you if you don’t remember ASH. A tantalizing early-generation DS tactical RPG from Hironobu Sakaguchi’s Mistwalker, ASH quickly gained recognition amongst a niche for its impressive styling and technical ambition. It was actually the first DS game to release on a 2 gigabit game card, thanks to its full motion video battle sequences. Despite a mild commercial reception in Japan, you’d think a critically-acclaimed, big-budget title from the creator of Final Fantasy would be high on Nintendo’s release priorities. Yet a release outside the East has never materialised.

Chances of release: Believe it or not, ASH was listed by the US age ratings board the ESRB over two years ago, igniting the hopes of western gamers eager to get their hands on a localised version. But here we are, still waiting, and there’s no sign that Nintendo are interested in a release. It could be the sort of thing that turns up on a release list out of the blue (a la Jam with the Band) but it’s been so long, we wouldn’t bet anything on it. Perhaps it’s best to look forward to Mistwalker’s The Last Story instead.

Despite being best known to some Nintendo gamers for the little-played Wii action game Disaster: Day of Crisis, Monolith Soft’s forte is very much the RPG genre. Soma Bringer saw the studio bring their knack for refreshingly intense gameplay experiences to the DS in the form of something of a rarity: a brand new IP. On the back of positive reviews, the new brainchild of Tetsuya Takahashi enjoyed a typically cult following but modest commercial success was likely the ultimate reason Nintendo never saw fit to bring us this soma.

Chances of release: Virtually non-existent, unfortunately. The game’s Japanese release was around two and a half years ago, and both the developer and Nintendo seem to be well-occupied with other projects.

We move on to one of the more controversial titles on the list. The lengthy saga of Fatal Frame IV’s release was dogged with distress that would ultimately be moistened by the tears of a generation of horror fans and Nintendo gamers. When Nintendo acquired the exclusive rights to publish the newest entry in the highly acclaimed Fatal Frame series, with Killer7 legend Suda 51 on board to boot, Wii owners around the globe revelled the glee. Yet for a still-unexplained reason the release of this globally popular product never occurred outside Japan. Under a pristine PR surface rumours bubbled of tussles between publisher Nintendo, who were allegedly unsatisfied with the game’s overall quality, and lead developer Tecmo, who were seemingly reluctant to go back to address certain issues to make the game suitable for a worldwide release. We can but speculate with hindsight.

Chances of release: Despite cropping up on various UK release lists with various subtitles (and even in a European magazine advert), the gamer-led push for Fatal Frame IV seems to have run out of steam. The closest thing we’ll be getting to a Nintendo/Tecmo collaboration will be next month’s Metroid: Other M, but internet-savvy gamers desperate to experience Fatal Frame IV in English can make use of a fan-made translation patch.

And now for something completely different. And to be honest, that would probably be understating the oddness of Captain Rainbow. Under the hood, it’s a relatively straightforward action/adventure game. But on the surface it’s less straight than Elton John. Set in a world inhabited by washed-up, small-time supporting characters of various Nintendo franchises, it could be described as the locked-up, oft-beaten sibling of Super Smash Bros. The game was certainly an odd venture for Nintendo and one that is sadly destined to be a footnote in the Wii’s history.

Chances of release: Can you say ‘zilch’? Captain Rainbow has this semi-disturbing, underlying theme surrounding the question of Birdo’s gender. We’d say it’s the sort of thing too Japanese for the West, but it seems the game’s... ‘charm’ was lost even on its home crowd, managing very poor numbers on its release. Still, we’re glad we witnessed Nintendo metaphorically questioning its own sexuality.

Apparently people just can’t get enough of Mario-themed baseball. Mario Super Sluggers was the (apparently necessary) sequel to the late-Gamecube era Mario Superstar Baseball and added some Wii Remote swinging fun to proceedings. As far as we can tell that’s pretty much all it did, but perhaps we’d be able to judge that for ourselves if we resided in a region where baseball is actually popular. Still, it’s odd to see a Mario sports title not granted a worldwide release as they’re generally pretty effective at bringing home the bacon wherever they’re on the shelves.

Chances of release: We’re not sure too many Europeans will be devastated that any of chance of NOE localising Mario Super Sluggers is very slim. Not to worry too much, as Mario will be back participating in a whole array of sports next year in Mario Sports Mix. Anyone who can’t sleep at night knowing they’re missing out on some Mario baseball can always hunt down the Gamecube iteration.

This one hurts us deep. The original Excite Truck was a well-received first-wave Wii game that made a lot of money for Nintendo and Monster Games, so naturally, the studio were put to work on a sequel. ExciteBots took a slightly less realist approach, ramping up the craziness aspects, adding in a heap of new features as well as banging in an online mode. It baffles us immensely why the game would only see the light of day in North America. Even there ExciteBots was grossly under-marketed by Nintendo and for their cynicism it grossly under-performed. Of all the games on the list, this is undoubtedly the one to be most angry about.

Chances of release: There was absolutely no reason for ExciteBots to fail to see a worldwide release but it’s been over a year now. For all Nintendo’s ingenuity, situations like this make us a tad doubtful that the company is indeed interested in standing up for the little gamer. If Monster Games have been put onto greater things and we see a new F-Zero by the end of the Wii’s lifetime, then (almost) all will be forgiven. For the moment, bad form Nintendo.

Chibi-Robo! became everyone’s favourite miniature trash-bot when he sprung to life on our Gamecubes back in 2006. His premiere outing was probably the last great Gamecube-exclusive title to hit our shores, garnering much praise for its innovating gameplay mechanics and humorous, light-hearted mood. Undoubtedly a very underrated and under-played game it was very good news to learn Skip was hard at work creating a DS sequel subtitled Park Patrol, and also that Nintendo were re-releasing the original on Wii under the New Play Control! banner. Fast-forward a couple of years, and us European chumps are still waiting for both.

Chances of release: The Western release of Park Patrol was certainly an odd one. In America the game was distributed in meagre numbers exclusively in Wal-Mart stores, and had a similarly tiny release in Australia. Importers shouldn’t have too much trouble tracking down an English copy and luckily all DS games are region-free. As for the New Play Control! iteration of Chibi-Robo!, it would seem Nintendo has all but shut up shop the range of Wii-makes, so don’t expect it to pop up on a release list any time soon. If it’s any consolation we did get Pikmin 2, unlike our American friends.

Dynamic Slash tickled our fancies when it was unveiled in late 2008 as a MotionPlus-enabled slash ‘em up. When it released in Japan this year as Zangeki no Reginleiv, it was an ostensibly rare venture for the Big N, employing enough blood and guts to ensure it was the first ever Nintendo game to receive a CERO D age rating (17+). The developers behind the game were Sandlot, who are perhaps best known for creating the well-received, low-budget Xbox 360 game Earth Defence Force (and also the superior, UK/Japan-only PS2 release Global Defence Force). The studio brought their trademark tactic of relentless action over, shall we say, technical polish, and thus the game divided reviewers in Japan as well as those die-hard enough to import it.

Chances of release: With big names like Kirby and Metroid set to take the limelight this year, and a little game called Zelda waiting in the wings for 2011, we don't think Nintendo are too bothered about giving a small title like this localisation, not least of all due to the irreconcilable differences between the game’s content and the company’s Western image as a provider of family-friendly fun. Like Captain Rainbow it looks like Zangeki will go down as a one-off, under-appreciated business venture for Nintendo.

Monolith Soft’s second appearance rounds off our list with their recent return to form. Xenoblade, with minimal relation to the studio’s previous Xeno games, is perhaps the tastiest-looking Wii JRPG on current release. With a massive game world, real-time battle mechanics and a sumptuous score, Xenoblade dazzled Japanese critics earlier this year, racking up a very respectable 9/9/9/9 in Famitsu. If Western horror fans were chomping at the bit for Fatal Frame IV, then the RPG nuts are getting ready to devour it and demand a bigger one for Xenoblade.

Chances of release: Out of all the games on this list Xenoblade is probably the one most likely to get a happy ending, if only because its Japanese release was so recent. Plus, the game persisted on Nintendo’s latest release schedule for North America as ‘TBA’, and we know from the words of NOA’s Cammie Dunaway that the company is aware of the title, which is more than could be said for Fatal Frame IV. Fingers crossed, and some letter-writing to Nintendo wouldn’t hurt, either.

___

And the moral of the story? Nintendo are terrible at releasing their own games.

- Aaron Clegg