Hello! No, don't go away! Yes, this is the Barnyard preview, but just stay for a few moments; you may learn some interesting things. Honestly! Okay? Okay, great. I'm glad I have your attention. Let's start.

Barnyard on the Wii is basically Barnyard on the GameCube, with a fair amount of Wii sensitive sections grafted on (gosh it gets repetitive typing that). Barnyward on the GameCube, in case you didn't know, is the licensed game of the film Barnyard, the latest in a line of thoroughly mediocre children's animated films which makes us yearn for the wonders of Beauty and the Beast all over again. The Barnyard IP was grabbed by THQ, a thoroughly mediocre publisher, and made into a free roaming come platformer come action game in time for bored kids at Christmas. The game? Thoroughly mediocre.

Hopes for the Wii update aren't too great, but there are some notable aspects to it. The main game, in which you control a cow and do some exploring and jumping about, and probably a few other things, is the same as before. But like Rayman and WarioWare: Smooth Moves, the game knows the appeal of mini-games on the Wii, and does exploit this. There are a whole bunch of quick, enjoyable, mini-games to try out – fifty in fact, and they challenge you to use the Wiimote for some swinging, or some dancing, and other tomfoolery. It's hardly Zelda, but it could be the perfect title to keep younger siblings quiet, and maybe get them to do a bit of exercise too. Of course, if you wanted a mini-game based Wii title, we'd probably recommend you buy Ravving Rabbits, so that's that a bit doused.

Okay, what else? Hmm. That's actually about it I think. I was thinking of making some sort of pun about the game being 'udderly' dispensible, but I'll leave that to Gamesmaster I suppose. Oh, I promised you something interesting, didn't I? Right, okay. How about this: a single cow emits enough methane gas in a single day to fill 400 litre bottles. Isn't that fascinating?

Well, I think so anyway.